top of page

Managing Postpartum Anger Towards Your Partner

After the arrival of a new baby, while there's a lot of joy, there's also a great deal of stress. You may find yourself feeling uncharacteristically angry towards your partner, even over seemingly small things. If you’re experiencing these intense emotions, first, breathe—you’re not alone. Postpartum anger is more common than many people think and discussing it openly is the first step toward managing it effectively.

1. Understand the Roots of Your Anger

Anger usually stems from deeper emotions like fear, exhaustion, or feeling overwhelmed. Postpartum life can be incredibly demanding, and sleep deprivation does not make things any easier. Hormonal changes can also make your emotions feel like a rollercoaster. Recognizing what triggers your anger can help you address the underlying issues. Are you feeling unsupported, neglected, or overly fatigued? Identifying the root causes allows you to communicate these feelings more clearly to your partner.

2. Communicate Openly and Honestly

When you’re feeling calm, have an open discussion with your partner about your feelings. Use "I" statements to express yourself without blaming them, such as "I feel overwhelmed when I don’t have help in the evenings." Clear communication can prevent misunderstandings and provide your partner with the insights they need to support you better. Remember, your partner might also be grappling with their own adjustments and could be unaware of your needs unless you voice them.

postpartum women

3. Set Realistic Expectations

Both you and your partner are navigating a major life change, and adjustments won’t happen overnight. Set realistic expectations about daily routines and responsibilities. Discuss and agree upon who does what and when, and be open to adjusting these plans as you both settle into your new roles. This clarity can reduce frustration and make the workload feel more manageable.

4. Schedule Time Together

It might seem counterintuitive to spend more time together when you’re feeling angry but reconnecting can actually help ease tension. Plan small, achievable moments together like having a cup of coffee or watching a show after the baby sleeps. This time allows you to remember and strengthen your bond as partners, not just as co-parents.

5. Seek Individual Time

Personal time is incredibly important in managing stress and anger. Make sure both you and your partner have time to yourselves regularly. Whether it’s pursuing a hobby, exercising, or simply reading a book, time alone can help you recharge and gain perspective.

6. Practice Stress-Relief Techniques

Incorporate stress-relief techniques into your daily routine. Deep breathing, mindfulness, and meditation can be very effective in managing emotions. Apps or online videos can guide you if you’re new to these practices. Even a few minutes a day can make a significant difference in how you feel.

smelling the roses to stop postpartum depression

7. Consider Professional Help

If your anger feels uncontrollable or starts to affect your relationship deeply, it may be helpful to speak with a therapist. Therapy can provide you with strategies to manage your emotions and improve your communication. Couples therapy can also be beneficial, providing a neutral space to explore your feelings with professional guidance. We at Gabby Cares can help you and your partner get through this period. Book your session by emailing us at or call us at 786-490-5988.

8. Support Networks

Don’t underestimate the power of community. Talking with friends, joining a support group, or connecting with other new parents can provide emotional support and practical advice. Sharing your experiences and hearing others can validate your feelings and provide new coping strategies.

new family

9. Watch for Signs of Postpartum Depression

While it’s normal to experience some degree of mood swings after childbirth, persistent anger could be a sign of postpartum depression (PPD). Be mindful of other symptoms such as feelings of sadness, withdrawal, or disinterest in activities you used to enjoy. If you suspect you might be experiencing PPD, seek help from a healthcare professional.

10. Celebrate Small Victories

Finally, acknowledge and celebrate the progress you and your partner make as you navigate this journey together. Recognizing small victories can boost both of your spirits and motivate you to keep going. Remember, you’re both learning and growing through this transformative period.

Experiencing anger postpartum doesn’t make you a bad partner or parent; it makes you human. With open communication, mutual support, and perhaps some professional guidance, you can manage these feelings and move forward together in this new chapter of your life.

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page